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LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT

It’s the age-old question, Do you believe in love at first sight? Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, especially to all you Sunshine Sally’s out there, but love at first sight is not real. But before you start hating on me because I’ve murdered your love-fantasies, let me throw it into perspective for you. You see, love at first sight can’t be real because the person you see at first sight is not real. Of course the person before you is a real flesh and blood human being to whom you feel powerlessly drawn, but as far as who the person is – you haven’t a clue. They are but a fantasy, a projection of whom you imagine your ideal love-object to be. In short, the person before you is an il

FIND YOUR BODY, FIND YOUR GROUND

Your body is your ground. When you are connected to your body you are connected to a secure base that enables you to engage your world with confidence and thoughtful intention. It allows you to regulate yourself and hold a steady line amid the unpredictable ups and downs of the day. When grounded in your body, you also have access to it’s innate wisdom, intelligence, and instincts – vital resources necessary to realize your goals and actualize your authentic self. When you disconnect from your body and lose your ground, you become reactive to your environment, and life becomes about surviving and getting through the day. Anxiety imbues the experience of living making it very difficult to fee

6 SIGNS YOU'RE IN NEED OF TENDER LOVING SELF-CARE

Self-care is imperative to achieving emotional and physical health. However, you and I both know that amid the hullabaloo of everyday life, self-care often takes a backseat to the laundry list of things that need to get done - the intention is there, but we fall short of execution. Sometimes we forgo self-care to the point we don’t even realize how badly our needs have been neglected until we find ourselves cursing obscenities at the chair on which we just stubbed our toe. At this point, it's time to take a breather. Self-care is, essentially, any action that fosters the maintenance of personal health and well-being and it is different for everyone. For some, a massage or pedicure does the

IN THE LIFE OF A CHILD: REMEMBERING MR. S

“All our handling of the child will bear fruit, not only at the moment, but in the adult they are destined to become.” A couple of months ago, Mr. S, a childhood neighbor and family friend, suddenly passed. The deep feelings of loss generated by his death caught me off guard - it had been over fifteen years since I had seen him. Why would the loss of someone whom I hadn’t had contact with in so long generate such profound grief? This didn’t make much sense to me. As I pondered my feelings, I reflected upon the time I spent with Mr. S and his family when I was a kid and I began to see exactly why his passing left me with such deep sadness. Mr. S and his family lived two doors down from my hom

TALKING TO TEENS

How does that saying go – “I see your mouth moving, but all I hear is blah, blah, blah, blah…?” This is often the experience of a teenager when their parents chime in with commentary on anything from grades, to friends, to electronic devices and social media and it is not uncommon for such well-intentioned commentary to trigger backlash that can precipitate WWIII. Adolescence is a tricky time because teenagers do not want to be told what to do and yet they still want and need parental guidance (though they do not dare admit this to you). It's a seemingly impossible double bind for the parent – how do I help my child who wants my help and yet rejects it (and me!) when I provide it? The key to

FIGHT IT OUT - 10 RULES FOR CONSTRUCTIVE FIGHTING

Though conflict in relationships can feel uncomfortable and for some, even a bit scary, constructive fighting is actually a healthy part of every relationship. The problem is, many couples have not learned how to fight constructively, which can have the effect of turning a minor conflict into unprecedented warfare. Here are 10 rules for those of you who need help fighting it out. 1. The past is not present. Stay on point, any past grievance is not allowed in your current argument. If past grievances should come up, make time to address them separately at another time. 2. Make an appointment. Timing is everything when it comes to fighting. It is often the case that when an argument arises,

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© 2020 BY DR. MICHELE BLUME. DESIGNED BY LEILA RADER DESIGNS