Boundaries

Drawing boundaries is a profoundly life-affirming skillset that facilitates your ability to protect your physical and energetic space. Like the bank of a river or the shoreline of the ocean, boundaries draw a clear line between what is you and what is not you; they define where you end and other begins. In doing so, boundaries enable the authentic unfolding of your truest self. They safeguard you against being overwhelmed; they protect you against the absorption of harmful emotional debris from others; and they shield you against the disregard of those who do not respect your sacred right to expand, express, and create. When you trust in your ability to draw clear and effective boundaries, you can freely engage the world without fear because you are no longer at the whim and mercy of whatever and whoever comes your way. You can take command of your life and decide who and what is given access to your heart and who and what is not—and why.

It is important to note that boundaries are intended not only to protect you, but to protect others as well. Boundaries safeguard the important people in your life against the resentment often experienced when you feel used and mistreated. When you learn to assert limits, you will find that your relationships improve because you can show up and be present for others in a way that meets their needs and yours. You can give to others, care for others, sacrifice for others, and love others because the locus of power remains within you—it is your choice how much you give and where you draw the line. Even when you negotiate boundaries in your relationships, you can sit at the table as an active participant and advocate for your own needs while respecting the needs of others. In doing so, you can settle on a boundary that respects everyone involved, including yourself."